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\title{Discussion paragraph\\\large{Rethinking Fundamental Theology, chap. 3}}
\author{Camil Staps}
\date{September 17, 2015}

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    O'Collins writes\footnote{Rethinking Fundamental Theology, Oxford University Press 2013, p.~50} about discovering the meaning of our experiences:

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        The journey to discover meaning may prove a long one. Paul acknowledged how the central symbol of the Christian message, the crucified Jesus, came across to many as scandalous nonsense (1~Cor.~1:23) rather than meaningful and life-giving truth. But he gave himself wholeheartedly to his ministry (\dots). In his own case it took a word from the risen Lord to make sense of some mysterious affliction that he had been enduring (2~Cor.~12:7-9).
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    This raises several questions:

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        \item Does (some) experience come directly from God?
        \item For those experiences, does God help us in finding meaning?
        \item Why is it that some people are quicker to discover meaning than others?
        \item Can finding meaning be a curse?
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    Without going into too much detail here, I think from a Christian perspective we could answer the first question affirmatively. Not only did the disciples experience Christ directly, also various visions point to this. There is room for a different point of view, however: other visions were experienced indirectly, like John's Revelation which was brought to him by an angel (Rev.~1:1). Yet, to say no experience comes directly from God would imply such a very different concept of prayer than most Christians have, that I don't want to discuss that here. The verse O'Collins refers to, 2~Cor.~12:7-9 is but one example of divine revelation through prayer.

    Then, it should be easy to say that the beginning of the `journey to discover meaning' of an experience would be the experience itself, and so, God would indeed help us in finding meaning. And also since experiences can help to explain others, it would seem obvious that God does help us to find the meaning of our experiences, especially those that come from Him.

    Yet this brings us to a problem. Why is it given to Paul to participate in a dialogue with the Lord in such an extraordinary way as displayed in 2~Cor.~12:7-9? Very few Christians I know would talk that steadfastly about prayer -- indeed, they would consider their prayer to be a new experience to be explained rather than the explanation for an old experience.

    So how come that Paul gets to receive this revelation so concretely and unambiguously while others are left searching blindly in the dark? Is Paul more important to God than others? Is He then also closer to Paul than to others? Is it more important to have meaning for Paul's vocation than for other vocations? But wouldn't the first step of any vocation be to find it, and thus, understand the meaning of the experience(s) that help you find your vocation? Was Paul more devout than others? Then why was it given to him even when he was still a prosecutor of Christians, to meet the Risen Christ (Acts~9:3-6)?

    Saying that God makes us experience things directly, and that He helps us to find meaning to those experiences, seems to imply also that He in some way prefers some people over others. To someone used to church hierarchies this may seem acceptable, but it really isn't. Preference of some implies rejection of others, and faith was given to everyone equally (Acts.~11:15-18): God does not prefer some over others, and therefore must be present in me as much as in anyone.

    However, we can explain Paul's quick understanding in a different way, by asking the last question listed above. If meaning would be a curse to some, and a blessing to others, depending on the experience and the person, this would resolve all our problems with people failing to find meaning and others finding it easily. The former would be helped by God in \emph{not} finding meaning. But what kind of experience can we imagine that knowing its meaning would not be beneficial? As said above, is finding your vocation not done by discovering the meaning of your experience, and is finding your vocation not beneficial?

    If we can finally establish that meaning is not a curse, we can only deny Paul's quick understanding if we still want to believe in a `fair' God. Surely, we can say Paul is jumping to conclusions in the 2~Cor paragraph referred to above. But that would mean questioning his letters and thus the authority of the Bible, something we should not take up too lightly. Or can we find another way out of this dilemma?
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